Understanding Termination for Medical Reasons & Navigating This Loss
Pregnancy is a deeply personal and emotional experience, filled with anticipation and hope for the future. However, not all pregnancies develop as expected, and some parents are faced with difficult decisions surrounding their unborn child’s health and well-being. This is when Termination for Medical Reasons (TFMR) could be something that your provider discusses regarding your pregnancy.
In this post, learn what TFMR means, support that is available, and coping strategies if you or a loved one is facing this difficult experience.
What Is Termination for Medical Reasons
TFMR stands for Termination for Medical Reasons and refers to the decision to end a pregnancy due to medical complications. TFMR can be considered when prenatal screening or diagnostic tests—such as non-invasive prenatal testing (NIPT), nuchal translucency ultrasound, chorionic villus sampling (CVS), or amniocentesis—indicate a high risk or presence of severe fetal anomalies or maternal health complications. These tests help parents and healthcare providers make informed decisions about continuing or ending the pregnancy.
There are two main TFMR procedures:
1. Medical termination. This involves taking medications to stop the pregnancy without surgery, and can often be used at any stage of a pregnancy.
2. Dilation & Evacuation (D&E). A D&E is a procedure to remove contents.
The decision to undergo TFMR is deeply personal and often very difficult because it usually involves a wanted and planned pregnancy. Parents may experience grief, fear, and confusion, and require emotional and psychological support both during and after the process. Support networks, counseling, and specialist care teams are often involved to help families navigate this challenging experience.
How To Cope With A TFMR Pregnancy
Facing a TFMR pregnancy is not only a physical experience, but also an emotional one, often accompanied by grief, guilt, confusion, or anger. Here are some tips to guide you through this difficult time.
Community Support
Therapy For TFMR⎯Talking with a therapist who specializes in individuals who will be having a TFMR, or who have gone through this will be important since they have been trained and understand how to guide you through the process. At Grounded Women’s Wellness, our therapists who specialize in TFMR offer a non-judgemental space for you to heal and discuss whatever you need.
TFMR Support Groups⎯Connecting with others through TFMR support groups can help with healing because you can talk to others who have shared experiences and know that you’re not alone.
Community Resources⎯Organizations like Ending a Wanted Pregnancy or Empty Arms Bereavement Support have resources for TFMR.
Practice Self-Compassion
Grief can be a complex and non-linear process. Allow yourself to feel and process your emotions on your own timeline, without judging yourself. If you need to take that trip you’ve been saving for, do that. If you need to be by yourself in your room, that’s okay. Make sure you are taking care of yourself because you can’t heal if your well-being isn’t taken care of.
Lean On Your Support Network
If you feel comfortable doing so, open up to trusted family members, friends, or partners, and lean on them for support. Communicating your feelings and experiences⎯as difficult as it may be, helps relieve emotional burdens you didn’t realize you were holding.
Journal Your Experience
Writing about your emotions and experiences can be a great tool in addition to seeing a TFMR therapist. Journaling offers a safe space to express feelings that may be hard to put into words, so you can express emotions that are building up inside. Putting thoughts on paper can make overwhelming problems feel more manageable because it allows you to reflect on your experience and feelings. Over time, you can look back on your journal entries and see how you’ve grown, which can be an encouragement during painful times.
Breaking The Stigma About TFMR
TFMR is a heartbreakingly difficult decision, but as a society, we rarely talk about it. And when someone is faced with an unimaginable choice, kindness and understanding can make all the difference. The silence surrounding TFMR perpetuates stigma, leaving individuals and families to grapple with their grief alone. Due to any misunderstanding or judgment, this can leave people feeling isolated with nowhere to turn. Breaking through the stigma starts with education and empathy.
Grounded Women’s Wellness Offers TFMR Therapy
Our therapists specialize in supporting individuals and couples who are making the decision to terminate their pregnancy for medical reasons. We have a safe, nonjudgmental space where all your feelings can be heard and acknowledged. Together, we can work through the complex emotions that come with this loss so you don’t have to carry it alone. Contact us to schedule a free 15-minute consultation.
Christine Grounds, LCSW
Christine Grounds is a therapist in NYC and the founder of Grounded Women’s Wellness. She specializes in working with women ages 20-50 who are navigating transitions in work, relationships and parenthood. She also has extensive experience working with new parents and parents of children with special needs.
